el efecto domino

funny how things happen. our honda civic died on us, so i made an uneducated guess that it might be the starter. i don't know much about cars, but i do know a thing or two about people, namely, those who are able to fix things. so when we moved into our town home, i eyed out the locals. of note was one individual who was rather large and burly, smoked a pack-a-day and swore loudly at his children. so i gave him the big tv we had in the closet. from that point on, i knew he'd have my back. so i says to him yesterday- "where do you get your cars fixed?" he says "what's your problem?" "i think it's my starter." "lets have a look." sure enough, he confirmed my guess and told me to go buy the part, he'd help me install it. the next day we met outside to get the job done. as he leaned in over the engine to loosen the bolts on the starter, we hear a CRACK and a SQUIRT and my neighbor's eye is full of antifreez... yup, he had leaned too heavily on the radiator and cracked the encasement of under-pressure-contents. all of the sudden a simple neighborly exchange becomes a source of anxiety and awkardness for both parties, involving a rather costly repair... what would you do?

creation through death

this week i've been revisiting a text i read last year in a class at mhgs. the author is a french, feminist, postmodern weaver of language and ideas. the book is three steps on the ladder of writing. in it she introduces the creative process as needing of death:

"writing is learning to die. it's learning not to be afraid, in other words to live at the extremity of life, which is what the dead, death, give us... to be human we need to experience the end of the world. we need to lose the world... without that we know nothing about the mortality and immortality we carry. we don't know we're alive as long as we havn't encountered death: these are the banalities that have been erased. and it is an act of grace...that is grace: death given, then taken back."

the call is to let human brokenness impact one's art to result in work that is more raw, more terrifying, more beautiful, more human, more real. this is why "christian art" whether in painting, music or novels often seem flat and inauthentic. the christian vision is not just beautiful- for it is so only in contrast to the aweful yet necessary darkness of its context. this is why i have been so drawn to the creative work of novelist flannery o'connor, and musician david bazan. as artists, how can we be more honest with our faith, with our world and with our gifts? perhaps entering our brokenness to encounter death is a step in the right dirrection.

play

image copyright: nellis, 2004

sightings and crossings

to know and to be known in return

A SHOT IN THE DARK: my good friend bryan and i have had various conversations about the nature of blogs (in fact there has been discussion on his blog about this very thing). they are strange things, are they not? first of all, what are they? mine is a personal space, a creative outlet to vent thoughts, ideas, artwork, photos. basically, it's a journal/ scrapbook/ photoalbum. the question is, why make it public? i've been thinking about this a lot because my site meter at the bottom of the page tells me that aproximately 20 people visit my blog every day, yet only 1 person makes a comment every other day. who are you? why do you visit? what is so interesting? are you uplifted or disapointed when you leave? do you come because you know me and do you know me better when you link off? is your thought stimulated or do you quickly scan the site? perhaps the whole reason i blog is my innate desire to be known- my hunger for relationality. perhaps each post is a shot into the dark void, hoping someone, somewhere, out there will hear me and perhaps, perhaps understand me better, and engage. this is indeed my greatest need... and yours. you come to know, do you not? would you not also be known in return?
thanks for visiting.

regarding social change

I've been listening to a lot of Bob Dylan lately- one prominent song that continues to play in the back of my mind is The Times They Are A-Changin'. The last verse rolls, "As the present now will later be past the order is rapidly fadin'. And the first one now will later be last for the times they are a-changin'." The words of the prophet ring true, it is happening before our eyes every day.

How does the church deal with social change? Author Len Sweet identifies 3 different ways Christians have chosen to behave in the face of the changing times.

1. Reactive--wait until change occurs before you deal with it; assume that while change is always occuring, the future will still be like the past, utilize crisis management.
2. Responsive--while change is occuring, get involved to do what you can; anticipate what is probable, and be proactive once you see the direction change is going.
3. Redemptive--get ahead of change and try and steer it; no one can escape the reactive and responsive, but learn to read the handwriting on the wall, utilizing futuring and futures research as prophetic professions.

I know how I hope to respond, what about you?
May the creativity of God be in us.

serenidad

evil you can relate to

i've been reading a novel by Par Lagerkvist entitled The Dwarf. written in swedish in 1945, it is an autobiographical tale of hatred and murder. as the dwarf spins his yarn, he reveals his insecurities, prejudices, corruption, and inability to love. ulitmately it is a story about the brutal results of "otherness" carried to its fullest extent. what are we capable of if we fail to connect relationally with others? what will we become if we isolate ourselves in our own self-righteousness, never to give selflessly on behalf of the other? as i read the dwarf's story, i begin to see my own face in the pages of the text- in places i don't want to show up. i needed to be reminded of my own tendancies towards nonrelationality. so help me, God.

poverty and wealth: views from above

i stumbled upon an website that boasts stunning areal images of the great and terrible Mexico City. i recommend the slide show option- sit back and let the extremes wash over you.

shame and glory

"What a chimera, then, is man! what a novelty, what a monster, what a chaos, what a subject of contradiction, what a prodigy! A judge of all things, feeble worm of the earth, depositary of the truth, cloaca of uncertainty and error, the glory and the shame of the universe!" -Blaise Paschal

call of the wild

my good friend nate is getting on a plane tomorrow to go spend a year working for operation mobilisation as the right-hand-man for founder george verwer. we got talking about verwer's theology of mentorship: every year he takes a young man under his wing and pours his life into him- mentoring, discipleing and training. this got me thinking about the relationship between older and younger men in our culture. besides family and close relatives, i don't know any older men. similarily, i have never had an older man express genuine interest in me as a person. the gulf is marked by competitiveness, insecurities, fears and apathy on both sides- i own my contribution to the great divide. we see them as old codgers who's views are dated and irrelevant. they see us as young bucks who's views are naive and idealistic.

how would things be different if younger and older men began to take a genuine interest in one another? that as iron sharpens iron, we should learn from one another? but the key being dialogue- a two way street. wouldn't that absolutely turn the world on its head? these thoughts are far to radical to discuss in a public blog. i'll call it quits for now, with hopes that this entire operation might be spared...

two nuggets

"and in my best behavior
i am really just like him
look beneath the floorboards
for the secrets i have hid"
-sufjan stevens, concluding a song about john wayne gacy, jr.

"the good way must be clearly good but not wholly clear. if it is quite clear, it is too easy to reject."
- walter kaufmann

Presence and the other

i bumped into an old friend yesterday and had the pleasure of hanging out with him for a few hours. we talked about everything from a-to-z in lieu of catching up. but one portion of the conversation will stay with me for a while. he has been taking meditation classes at a local Buddhist temple where he is learning to slow down and enter every moment and every encounter with intentionality. this played out for him in the coffee shop where he had just worked the cash register for 8 hrs on a busy day. normally this would be a time to shut off the brain and go through the ropes until it is time to clock out. but this particular day was different. with every person that stepped up to order, he would say to himself- right now, all there is is you and me. and i want to find something in you, during this 30 second encounter, that is noble.

the obvious link in my mind was the I and Thou dialectic of Jewish mystic, Martin Buber. his understanding of encounter has become for me, the foundation of any relational endeavor- that in our engagement, i should see you as thou, not it. as a follower of the Christ, it is in the space between i and thou that we might have a memory of the incarnation and be reminded of the immanent return of Jesus.

needless to say, i recommended the book to my dear friend. he called me today to say that he purchased it and is well over half way through. may the relational fruit continue to abound!

el mysterio de nacimiento

the ironic context of hope

The other day, this text jumped out at me:

"Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel, to all the exiles whom I have sent into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce; take wives and have sons and daughters; take wives for your sons, and give your daughters in marriage, that they may bear sons and daughters; multiply there, and do not decrease. But seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the LORD on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare." -Jeremiah 29:4-7

Three things pop into my mind- missionality, indiginization and cultural mandate. Yahweh's word to exiles was not to forfeit hope, rather, it was a push towards a "living-into" of the context. Often, we as the church, are too busy "saving souls" and doing our own thing, that we neglect a developed ownership of the context in which we have been placed. Our sphere of involvement in the community is limited to how we might benefit. What if the church were to "seek the welfare of the city" where God has purposefully placed us? What if we were to idiginize- to own and live into the culture? What if we were to be cultural trend-setters instead of always trying to mouse-out the devil in culture? What if we were to cancel a Sunday service and spend that time working on the beautification of the neiborhood? What if we were to intentionally move away from the "us/them" and towards a "we"? Somehow that seems closer to the message of Christ.

sleepless in seattle

well, 24hrs before we were scheduled to leave oaxaca, ruth
fell ill again with mastitis, fever and the whole 9 yds of brutal
nursing discomfort. she was in no shape to travel and i had to
be back at work so she and sylas will stay an extra week with
her parents. needless to say, i've found myself spending a lot
of time browsing through pictures and folding and refolding
sylas' onesies.

oh the places you'll go

thoughts from afar

i want to point you to an excellent post out of australia by my friend chad- read his august 3rd post (Tolerance and Love). here's a teaser

"In a desperate bid to be accepted unconditionally we, ourselves, accept patchy costumes as complete, truthful representations of people – real people, with bitter disappointments and incredible transcendences – and in doing it, put ourselves so much further away from anything resembling an actual relational encounter."

jesse & sandra

my brother and his lovely lady were wed on saturday,
it was truly a unique wedding- mexican tradition and
avant garde were brought together to render the party
of the century- complete with a parade, marching mariachi
band, gigantic puppets, latin poetry, theological litany,
tamales, horchata, and flowers absolutely everywhere.

i'm proud of you, jess- your creativity is an inspiration to
me as i watch it infuse every aspect of your life.

how would marriages be different if we began to address
them creatively?

something trancendent about meetings

above: grandma, bunzer, u.jaime, u.jesse















above: uncle jesse and sylas














above: proud grampa