What I see resembles me at times that are not so fun. Trying to be a man and I keep trying when I really feel feeble like this picture. What is a man? In completion, a whole sense of manhood, I struggle with this.
just an observation--the canvas in this picture isn't completely black and we are able to see the image on it... meaning there is a source of Light -- even though it's not bright, clearly defined, or even noticeable. it's still there somewhere.
ahh yes, too much, too much indeed. too much for you to carry. i'm here with you on this, we have opposite art reactions on our blogs to this. both are valuable right now. i hope we can hold both at the same time. thanks for the courage to post.
good question nate, what does it mean to be a man when all i want to do is curl up in a ball and disengage from my reality?i just realized how mellow-dramatic it was to post this but at the time it seemed to speak the heavyness in my heart. i feel a definite "with-ness" from each of you and i am grateful. trying to hold both death and life...
phil don't second guess yourself on this. i posted that one piece i made called 'morning has broken' and i felt really connected to it. but had to remove it after a few days cuz i started getting panicked phone calls from friends and family asking if i needed an intervention or something. but if you can keep it up without people flippin, than i think it's good to see it daily and be reminded of where you were when you initally posted it. a healthy reflection on your own vulnerablity. thanks again.
yeah, phil... i totally agree with chuck. do you really want your blog (which is a representation of yourself) to be just roses and rainbows? those of us who are connected to you and hover around your blog appreciate your honesty and willingness to bear the bad with the good. case and point: this post has resulted in a network of words of encouragement and support being built around you.thanks for letting us share your "too much"...
yeah phil, thanks for being real.
Phil,Kind of off topic here, but you have a great blog and I was wondering if you could offer your services to others who want a good blog? It would be like web design but instead blog design - and you could charge a rate for doing it. With your artistic appreciation, flow of thoughts, understanding of the blog world and asthetics, you could mix up some great stuff for people - some like to do it themselves and others don't have time to put that much thought into it or just don't know where to go. You could offer your services here on this blog or even make a blog set up just for your business and then using links you could give them access to your portfolio. I think their might be some money in this. What do you think?Nathan
glad you like the get-up, nate. email me...
Phil, I feel every bit of that picture, quite often. Parenthood has naturally made me more selfless than ever. I'm not praising myself or anything, just stating that I rarely have time for myself any more. It's good, but sometimes I drag through school and life with bags under my eyes, thinking, "demasiado." I can only think of how these trying times are going to result in golden, joyous years when I am my parents' age. Hang in there and thanks for the post.
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